Letter 74 – Yup

Garrett,

It’s taken almost an entire year to accept the fact that you have died. That you are gone. I haven’t wanted to do this. And I’ve resisted it. But, it is time. You are not coming back. I will never see you again in this life. There is a part of me that still wants to call out, NO, this cannot have happened, but I tell that part of myself, now, to put its resistance down. It is time to fully accept that you are gone.

If I named the first year as the process of accepting your death, perhaps the second year will be about learning to trust in that death. To trust you. And to trust in you.